accepting things I cannot change

Yesterday was a pretty bad day.  Without going into any sort of detail, it was bad, like really bad.  It was so bad that not even homemade mac & cheese, the Bachelorette, a wonderful Hubby, and kitty snuggles could make it better.

I failed.  I fell flat.  I came up short.

How did I fail?  I had set a goal for myself.  It was a pretty big goal.  Yesterday I found out that my goal, which I thought I was inches away from achieving, was still miles away.  I was crushed, to say the least.  So, I decided that I'd let myself have a day.  One day to wallow in my self pity; one day to cry endlessly over my upset.  I needed that day.

In today's new light I can see everything a bit more clearly.  I recognize and accept that I cannot control the actions of other people.  I achieved my goal up to the point which was in my control.  All I can do is wait; wait for the universe, the uncontrollable factors in my life, to catch up with my ambition.

As my SIL said "Things will always work out if they are meant to be, easy or hard".  She's right, and I cannot thank her enough for her kind and reassuring words.

If it was meant to be for me to achieve my goal, it WILL happen eventually.  If I don't, at least I know that it wasn't because of my lack of trying; I know that I've done everything in my power to make this happen.

All of this made me think of something that was shown to me during a workshop that I attended many, many years ago:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr

I find that whenever I'm going through a difficult time, I look at these words and really absorb what they're all about.  Today, I'm accepting the things that I cannot change; I'm looking forward to fresh, new goals.

1 comment:

Barb said...

You are an amazing, wonderful person! I am so very proud of you, and love you so much!!