letting go

Is anybody else watching Oprah religiously lately?  I don't know if it's because it's the last season, or just because I have it PVR'd, but lately, I can't stop watching Oprah.

As I was watching the other day, Ms. O said something that really struck a chord with me.  I'm not quoting her exactly here, but it was something along the lines of "If somebody doesn't want me, than I stop wasting my time with them".  Now, I'm pretty sure that she said it MUCH more eloquently, but that's the gist of it.

In my continued efforts to search within myself, I've discovered that I have a really, really hard time with letting go of friendships that just don't seem to work anymore.  You know what I'm talking about.  You were once friends, sometimes even best friends, but through the years, things have changed, and you just aren't as close as you once were.  Something isn't working between the two of you anymore and no matter how hard you try and make it work, things will just will never be the same.

staying true to me, myself, and i

So, naturally, instead of letting these types of friendships go, I try and grasp on.  I feel like I'm on the edge of a cliff, only hanging on by my fingertips and I'm fighting my hardest to keep it from ending.  Okay, so maybe "my hardest" is a bit of an exaggeration, but I have the feeling that I'm just not ready to walk away.  In my inability to let go, I cause myself all sorts of unnecessary stress.  I can't stop thinking about it, talking about it (thanks, Hubby, for always listening!), and the knot in my stomach just won't go away.  I hate that I do this to myself.  So, I've decided to let go.  To stop forcing the relationship and just accepting the situation.  It's not working anymore.  I'm not going to get upset if an email or text doesn't get responded to.  It is what it is.  I'm letting go.


Jen said...

it's tough to come to that realization and then have to act upon that.

Good luck with it! And your continued self exploration.

Lindsay said...

I have sooo been there before (and still am sorta). It's definitely a hard thing to come to grips with but probably about two years ago, I came to the same realization - if someone isn't willing to put in the work to be my friend, then I was going to stop trying and stop caring. Once you come to that realization and put it into practice once or twice, it becomes a lot easier. I have found that I would rather spend my limited time and energy on those friendships that truly matter and that are beneficial to my life, rather than stressful. Good on you for doing this for yourself!! :) *hugs*

Amanda said...

Thanks, Ladies!

It's hard, but I'm already happier now that I've made the decision. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

Colleen said...

Sometimes we have to move on in our lives - old jobs, friends, husbands, beliefs, and ways of doing things that just may not fit any more. When we forgive ourselves and others for changing or not changing, the moving on is easier. As you said...It Is What It Is.